Summer 2010 - Fail

This Summer does not feel like "Summer". The heat is here in all it's glory, but the "vacation" part of it just didn't do it's part. I can't recall anything worthy during the past three months.
Okay Summer, I give you this last month to impress me! Do me excitement
Once Summer is over, I'll come back and make a list

my way of keeping up with the blog

Where were you 3 hours ago? in the kitchen
Have you ever eaten a crayon? No
Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you? my cell phone cover and wallet
When is the last time you went to the mall? last week
Are you wearing socks right now? nope
Does your family have a car worth over $2,000? yes
When was the last time you drove out of town? I personally haven't drove out of town, but went out of town two weeks ago
Have you been to the movies in the last 5 days? nope
Are you hot? yes, its summer
What was the last thing you had to drink? a stranger drink called Limka
What are you wearing right now? Grey sweats and green shirt
Do you wash your car or let the car wash do it? I let the rain wash it
Last food that you ate? cupcake
Where were you last week at this time? at home I assume
Have you bought any clothing items in the last week? actually, no I haven't!
When is the last time you ran? last night, two laps and I was done!!
What's the last sporting event you watched? NBAAAAAAAAAAAA
What is your favorite animal? turtles obviously.
Your dream vacation? somewhere quite
Last person's house you were in? Hafsa's... and thats been over 2 week. I really need to get out more
Worst injury you've ever had? I fell on my head, and now I'm missing a bit of my eye brow
Do you miss anyone right now? Yeah, a few people
Last play you saw? two years ago
What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex? hahaha I have nothing!
What are your plans for tonight? Dinner
Who is the last person you sent a MySpace message or comment? I don't have myspace
Next trip you are going to take? Inshallah next year
Ever go to camp? No :(
Were you an honor roll student in school? I wish
What do you want to know about the future? I don't know actually
Are you wearing any perfume or cologne? Fairy dust
Are you due sometime this year for a doctor's visit? I'v way over due
Where is your best friend? I don't have a best friend
How is your best friend? My friends are good
Do you have a tan? I'm brown so yes
What are you listening to right now? Opening speeches of Masjid abu bakr
Do you collect anything? Well not that I have a collection but I like to have shalws and maybe shoes....AND BAGS
Who is the biggest gossiper you know? My 3 year old nephew
Last time you got stopped by a cop or pulled over? haven't so far, thank god
Have you ever drank your soda from a straw? I do it all the time
What does your last text message say? it says "hes from England, different part of it I think, so thats why"
Do you like hot sauce? Love
Last time you took a shower? last night
Do you need to do laundry? I did it this morning
What is your heritage? Pakistani
Are you someone's best friend? I don't think so
Are you rich? no but I'm blessed with what I have
What were you doing at 12AM last night? showering

it's time

It's time....time for a change.

feminist - meninist

Men and women are NOT equal. Before assuming that a religion or a culture is unjust due to the differentiation of commandments for males and females, keep in mind that we are more different then alike. The same way a man can’t give birth, a woman cannot be as strong as a man (physically or emotionally) and that is just how God made us. Women are sensitive and because of that sensitivity we’re all about relationships and men are focused and that’s how they go on about living their lives. Women can’t handle everything a man can handle and a man can’t bear what a woman can tolerate. Men dominate this world because they don’t use emotion to run countries and businesses etc .

I’m not saying women can’t do it if they wanted it, but rather that it’s more likely that men are better at it than females. No one can run a household better then women can, I say this with experience and no one can replace lady-of-the-house, not even the maid of White House. Men always come up with new ideas, a woman adjusts those ideas and that’s all! Anyhow my point being, just because we’re not equivalent doesn’t mean that we’re inferior.

Plus, I like not having facial hair and not having handwriting of a 7 year old.

pure

Nothing that I have experienced in life feels better than when I’m able to live life in a spiritual sense. That being, when your intentions and thoughts are pure and not filled with selfishness, ego, greed, materialism, critical etc. It’s definitely not the easiest thing to do in this time and age and for me, it doesn’t last for a long period of time. When that period is gone, I miss that peace of mind. It ever so rarely happens where all you feel is content about yourself, others, the present, future and past. I get that slight feeling sometimes when I finish praying, but then I’m up and back to reality.
When I was a young-adult, I had felt that way about life for a few months and I lie not, I was on cloud nine. After that, life started new issues, new relations and everything that comes with that package. Year after year I lost myself and forgot the feeling of contentment.

You pass

Anyone and everyone who tells you that getting your license is easy....is lying. It is not easy at all, it's quite hard actually. it your luck as to who your instructor happens to be, because you may get 1 out of the 4

1- The fair - they watch for your driving to be safe and follow the rules. Basically the law and your confidence on the road, according to that they pass or fail you!

2- The happy - you make tons of mistakes, and you can even notice them as your driving but your happy little instructor is either too busy being chatty or just being happy. (I got this one, and she was so involved in talking about her life and family from other countries, that she had no idea that I drove in the left lane the whole time. I'm not complaining whatsoever but I practiced so much to learn my parallel parking’s and what not. When I did them, she didn't check if I had done it properly or not. But I love her, I will pray for her happy soul until next year when I need to get my G)

3- The moody - If you catch them on a good day, you pass, if you catch them on a bad day, you fail. If it's right before lunch time or end of the day, you pass, if it's mid hot day, you fail. You get the point

4- Face'ist - They can be either racist, sexist, appearcence'ist. They might just not like you appearance. You just might be too ugly to get your g2.

The end.

Just kidding, if you’re a good driver and they fail you, go complain on their *one of the above* self!

Personal story: I was standing in line for my license papers and when it was my turn, one of the instructor came to the lady who was assigning the papers. He says to her “see that guy in red shirt at the end of the line, he is a buddy of mine so....." and then he winks. He winks!
and ofcourse, out of all the glory he "happened" to take his friends driving test. How fortunate is

I will find you and make you mine!

Late and Random

Outside my window...a lower view of a balcony and then the backyard underneath

I am thinking... about August

I am thankful for...My Dad

From the kitchen.... too much left from yesterday.

I am wearing... Orange shirt and grey sweats

I am creating....the house to be cleaner

I am going... finish painting

I am currently reading... Fatally Falky by Diane Mott

I am hoping...for the better

I am hearing....the bird chirping outside

Around the House.....soundless

One of my favorite things.....a smile

A few plans for this week....work during the day, household stuff for the evening. Long weekend, America shopping trip and baby shower.

12 Thoughts'
1. I was so excited when I .... got engaged
2. If I had some "mad money" to spend right now, I'd buy.....all of my tuition
3. I really shouldn't have... disobeyed
4. Anything sad that I read about..... makes me cry
5. The antics of..... keep me together
6. Family is..... I don’t really know
7. I just cannot believe.... how fast time goes by
8. I'm really looking forward to... Friday
9. The weather right now has been.... extremely hot
10. My mood right now is... exhausted/lazy
11. I couldn't believe... how quickly this year has already gone.
12. And now I am going to... clean

gah!

I’m not very good with change. I’m not fond of it, I find myself trying to change the new change back to the old way as much as I can.

I don’t like the keyboard of my new laptop; therefore I won’t enjoy writing on it. I also don’t like windows vista, nothing pops up on it, everything is so calm and round and blue and overly organized. Maybe I can go back to windows xp somehow. If “gah” was a word, I’d say it right now

Hermes.....faaaaaaabulousssss

No one listens, everyone talks.

No one listens, everyone talks. Sometimes when we do listen, we’re just waiting for them to finish so we can begin. Listening is a lively process to discern what the person is saying and feeling. Sometimes, all I want is for someone to listen to what I have to say and I wish for myself to do the same listening in return because that’s how we really get to know people and many times we find the better in person rather then worst. Other times, we’re listening to someone talk on, and in our head, we get an idea and we’re waiting for them to finish and holding onto our thought so desperately because we know “exactly” what to say. If not that, we’re ready to be Dr.Phil with a list of advice. News flash: Not everyone is seeking for advice

We can be so judgmental about others situations or feelings that we don’t care enough for their point of view. If someone is freaked out about something, which may mean nothing to us, doesn’t signify it doesn’t mean anything at all. Everyone lives a diverse life, with different experiences and importance of factors. It’s so much easier in words then in person to be nonjudgmental, because we judge people and things and statements within seconds. But I guess, maybe we can make an effort to be non-judgmental while we’re listening to someone trying to ease their heart. The least we can do is give our undivided attention, and just listen carefully to what the other person is saying and for once focus on feelings, not just facts. Yeah, facts are important, but so are feelings.

That being said, our lives are surrounded with distractions. If we’re in the middle of fighting our guts out and the phone rings, we run towards the phone. E-mail must be checked daily, and few times through out the day and everything else. I mean, if we’re in the middle of something, especially if that involves another person in a sensitive position, can’t a phone call wait? What will happen? If it’s important, they’ll leave a message, if not, we’ll see it on call id and call them back. We can always return calls, text back, and email later.
We’re always encouraged to talk, to get it out of our systems and what not. That only teaches us to complain, and then expect people to listen to those complains and become overly negative. Complaining is only half of the puzzle, the point is to figure something out, find some sort of comfort, get something out of talking it out.

It’s just been something I’ve been noticing, not in others but myself. I’ve seen people with a satisfied smile after being heard or disappointed faces because I just didn’t seem interested enough or something else was more important at the time.

Pakistan 2010

Why me

Nothing is in our command, we have choices, we have hopes and we have decisions and sometimes we lose control over our destination. When things don’t work out as planed, we think “why me” and in our philosophy and judgment, it just doesn’t feel fair. When we desire something or someone, which is all we want and when we don’t get it we believe that we missed out on one of the finest in life. Other times when something happens out of no where, we wonder why something so appalling happened to us and we always thinks of better things that should/could of happened but didn’t.



Sometimes, times later we gaze back and reflect back at those old bitter moments and realize that it wasn’t so bad. Somehow it fit into the story of our lives and maybe even for the better. God always has better plans for us and He directs us towards that way by us doing the right thing, and to choose the right path because we already know and sometimes even if that doesn’t work out, then the picture is much bigger then our diminutive imagination. Truthfully speaking, we know the line between the rights and the wrongs, we don’t even have to seek advice before doing so because only if we ask our selves, we’ll know and that is when we make the choice of doing what’s accurate or disobeying ourselves and God and following our pleasures just to fall flat on our face eventually.



Forgive me, we’re only humans, and we can’t help but make mistakes.

zipppp

I think to myself that I should try to be a better person, think of others before myself, and eat my words down when they’re not kind. For most part, I try, I really do but when I have a good come back, man! That is just my weakling. I have to say it and I have to say it right then, and if I really try hard and hold it in, I’ll have to repeat the story to my siblings or friends and tell them what I had to say in return. I mean if we’re both joking and I know the person well, then it doesn’t matter, they can say what they like and so will I. It’s when people are being rude or try to get all petty smart with me. Something people don’t apprehend is that when one is insulted on purpose, they know weather the other person does it in an obvious or non-obvious way. Usually I know where and with whom I should control those little smart-ass quick comments, but still it’s a horrible habit. I’m working on it, I promise. Especially now that I’m engaged, I say a few of my bitter-sweet words around the in-laws and that’ll be the end of me. Haha!
Other then that, it’s just not good ikram (respect of the people) on my part.

Hair timeline

Mind you; celebrities’ have hair stylists and awesome products so their hair always looks glamorous and nice.

I started off with this hair cut, but it was such a mistake because I couldn’t tie it so it was on my face all the time. I had to keep it straight; otherwise it looked a bit odd.

This is the current stage I’m on now, but fortunately my hair is a bit longer then this. This is slightly nice because I can tie it up and curl it or keep it wavy.

This is what I hope to have at the end of summer because they say hair grows fast in summer so I’m really counting on it.

Since I could never be blonde, this picture felt a real more realistic, so I hope to get back to longer hair.

I just have to add this: I hate when guys cut their hair like this.

My new list of rage from summer 2010.

To anyone laughing at my title, shut up.
Lets begin with how absolutely horrible it is when people welcome themselves into a home or space without a knock. First knock, wait for an answer and then enter and if there is no answer, then please leave. It doesn’t matter if your family, or a close friend or you live in my lap, please seek permission before entering.

Second, everything in life should be done in moderation. We should be able to determine where and when we’re welcomed or not. There is always a line between how much we should know and how much we try to find out by being nosey. Give people their privacy and respect it, and expect the same for your self. Don’t ask awkward questions which people are not comfortable answering and if it is asked by accident or curiosity or sometimes just for genuine care for the other person, but if there is hesitation or no answer in return. Do.Not.Ask.It.Again. Thank you.
Just like my first 10 lists of annoyance, I’ll say it again in, older girls: grow up. Younger girls: stay young

I am sick and I am tired of white old people saying rude things around me. Some are a little more blunt then others and say it to my face; others just mumble it out loud. All these statements about “this is Canada”/”your in Canada now”/”what the blah blah” I mean I really don’t care what people have to say about me covering my face in public but why the “oh Canada”. Because really, if I should go back to my country, then so should you because Canada sure as hell doesn’t belong to you. If an aboriginal came up to me and said “dear, please return to your country” I would maybe think about it, but as white people telling other race to go “back” to their country is kind of dumb.
Also, if I mess up on the road while I’m driving, people assume its because of me covering my face. Well last time I checked, we looked at the road with our eyes and not our whole face. I don’t screw up on the road because my face is covered; I screw up because I’m a bad driver. I’m sure when you learnt how to drive a manual car at first, you were jerking it all around and probably pissed off a whole lot of people as well, so shut up. It’s fine if your going to give me a figure or curse at me before you drive past, but don’t make dumb comments about my nikaab because really my eyes are wide open.

Why are there 101 movies on dogs, and sports and dogs playing sports? I mean, really who cares?

I hate how everyday, I wake up late because the night before I slept late. I slept late for no real reason, but morning/afternoon goes to waste.

Okay that’s all for now.

Good day.

When something unlawful or wrong is being done, a pang of guilt is in the heart. As it continues, the guilt lessens by every occurrence, subsequences by it being completely gone. When that guilt is vanished, it’s next to hopeless because how to help someone or something that doesn’t consider itself in need of help. It feels freer doing wrong and it ignores every part that tells it that it’s wrong. Although being rebellious isn’t a preference, it really is a choice.



A choice, which is more like a mistake, and the type of mistake which becomes regret. To having too many regrets in life makes it harder to move on with a positive view. How ashamed one becomes to go and seek for forgiveness from God after disappointing him so much, but like always he is and always will be the most forgiving.

One should put in the effort first into any sort of relationship, as a good manner and nature. That effort should be returned, following by both sides continuing to put effort for each other. That energy is bound to return and if it’s not then neither side will try. If no one tries, everyone complains.

In the hot days of june

June is here, is that astonishing or what? Bearing in mind that I still feel like I just gave my final exams at the end of April. As old as I will sound right now, I shall say it: time is flying. It’s good in a sense because I hope the next year flies by quickly so I can finish school.

Moving on…

I am in love with military fashion, particularly the jackets. It has a fresh new look to it, without being too out there. I’m generally not too funky but I like almost all types of military blazers that I’ve seen so far. Sadly, I don’t own any yet but I’m searching, my bet is I’ll find something inexpensive at forever 21

My unasked issue is, if you wear a dress and you have to be covered you (sometimes) end up wearing a shirt underneath your dress and it kills it. Maybe it was acceptable before because you didn’t have a choice but to wear a black shirt underneath but really, it just ruins the whole look. Dresses can be worn with blazers and they look cute. The boyfriend blazer or a loose cardigan over a spring/summer dress looks casual and nice. When I first saw boyfriend blazers, I wasn’t such a big fan because they seemed too formal to wear on a daily basis but I like the way it’s being paired with different casual things.

Ever if I wear black tights, and my feet are bare…I look like a duck. My legs look so toned and nicely shaped and then there are two huge feet (I’m size 9). But it’s not just me, it’s a lot of people tights don’t suit everyone. But you know what does suit everyone, tights that are all the way down. I get sick of things I see too much and I think I have seen too much of tights with everything. The worst is when I see it being worn with a shirt too short exposing the behind. Trust me, not a scene I want to see.

My friend showed me the “new trendy” oxford shoes and I’d like to add that that they are 1)ugly 2)manly looking 3)probably are for men 4)grandpa looking 5)gross

Journey of eternity

When someone dies, another someone is sent to this world and that is how the world goes round. The circle of life, the way life works; it’s all give and take. My Grandma passed away two days ago, and it hurts because we were close. It wasn’t just that she was close to me, she was close to everyone. She shared a special bond with all her grand-children, son/daughter in laws and her own children; she made everyone feel special and important and protected trust and secrets. She was pleasurable to talk to, and to share with and she made every difficulty seemed as if it were nothing. As a bonus, she was a very stylish for 57 year old lady. She was a strong woman with a beautiful heart, her Mum died when she was about 7 and she first born child is schizophrenic and her last born son in mentally disable, but she lived through it all without complains, so I hope and pray that she’s been granted a place in the highest place in Heaven and that she is resting in peace inshallah.

Sadly, life without her won’t be the same, especially for my Nana and my uncle to whom she still fed with her hands. Life goes on, at any pace so kindly pray for her soul and patients for her family. She will be greatly missed